What Hope, America?!

by Taxi

So Donald the Trumpet wants to be president of the United States. And Lindsey Graham crackers wants it too. Jeb the Bushka will give it a go and Rand Paul and Hillary Ono and Bernie Sanders – uhuh Bernie too.

That’s kinda the toppish dog line-up America’s got to choose from for president. Oh fuck!

Donald Trump. If he wins he’ll force us all to shampoo with Pantene Pro V.

Lindsay Graham: If he wins he’ll rename America Zionica and move the White House to a gay neighborhood in Tel Aviv.

Jeb Bush. If he wins, his mother will come spank us all one by one before bedtime – for four years.

Rand Paul. If he wins, he’ll have cop cars and armed drones chasing robbers down your Main Street and mine.

Hillary Clinton. If she wins, American sex scandals will be back in vogue and zilch will ever get done.

Bernie Sanders. If he wins, the Elders of Zion will sell more copies than the bible.

Oh fuck! An acute crisis of leadership is upon us.